Today, during one of my "seeking intimacy with Jesus" times, I sensed Him telling me that if I really desire to have Him as my most intimate friend, I need to have some things be only between us and no one else. Truthfully, I felt very sad about that. I do want Him as my most intimate friend, but I am not sure I am ready to give up sharing whatever is in my heart with the person with whom I want to share intimate details of my life. That was a real struggle for me today. I am walked away from that "intimacy building" time sad and discouraged...and no more intimate with Jesus than when I started.
Jesus, please forgive me when I say that I desire for You to be my most intimate friend, yet I am unwilling to let my heart belong exclusively to You in the most intimate sense. Please give me a deep desire to trust You with the most intimate places in my heart so my heart can be fully and exclusively Your's. I love You, Jesus.